Sunday, January 30, 2011

Buddy Boy

I can't believe it is almost February.  We have now almost gone a complete month (January) without our little boy.  I miss him so much!  I do good most of the time, but I still have my difficult moments.  For some reason, church seems to be the hardest time for me.  Today at church, I was having a hard time singing the sacrament hymn, and Tanner turned to me and said, "Mom, do you miss Buddy Boy?" (The kids have the nicknames  Buddy Boy and Boo for Andrew)  They have been missing Andrew a lot too.  This week Travis called for Andrew on two different occasions, and Tanner randomly came up to me and told me he missed Andrew.  It is such a blessing to be able to tell the kids where he is and that we will see him again.  We are so thankful for our understanding of the gospel of Jesus Christ!
 Aubs has such a mature understanding of the gospel and life.  Sometimes she will ask us questions or say things that show how much she comprehends.  Eric was putting her to bed and talking about Andrew's Birth Mom and how she is having a really hard time because she wasn't able to hold Andrew and tell him how much she loved him.  Eric explained to Aubree what an amazing person Andrew's Birth Mom is, and he told her  that Andrew's Birth Mom decided not to hold him, because she knew that she wouldn't be able to let go of him.  She chose not to hold Andrew, because she knew it would be best for him to have a mom and dad who could love and provide for him.  She loved him so much that she chose not to bring him home.  Aubree understood and expressed that she could see how that would be really tough.  When Eric then explained to Aubs that Andrew's birth mom was sad, because she never held Andrew and wasn't able to hug, kiss, and tell him how much she loved him, Aubree said very matter of factly, "well, that's ok, because when she dies and goes to the Spirit World, she will be able to see Andrew, and she will be able to tell him how much she loves him."  She sees the events of this life from an eternal perspective.  She is an amazing girl.

We tried to surprise Eric at school this week, and as we searched the dental school for him, we got some interesting looks.  One lady looked at the kids and started counting them and couldn't believe we had four kids.  I wanted to correct her immediately and make sure she knows we actually have five kids.  I want to walk around with a big picture of Andrew so people know we have another kid, make sure Andrew is never forgotten.  I don't like it when people don't know of our sweet boy.  I want everyone to know of Andrew, because he is an essential part of our family.  We wouldn't be the family we are without Andrew.  Now, I want to share with everyone the comforting, wonderful message that Andrew is part of our family, and we can be with him again.  This knowledge and understanding has made all the difference, as we have gone through the past month.

 I can't help but smile every time I look at this picture of Andrew.  Sara took it with some mirror app on her phone.  Andrew had the cutest personality.  Love him!
The rest of these pics are from this week.  The kids have been loving wearing their dress-up.  Trav is a Spiderman/Woody.
Tanner in his Batman outfit.   Poor Tann got Aubree's hand me down bike.
 Tanner is so full of personality.  He likes to wear swim trunks on his head like a hat/bandanna.
 Aubree's Rapunzel wig got wrapped around Tanner's wheel.
 Aubree and her new scooter she got from Christmas.  She is growing up too fast.


It was pretty nice this last week so we headed to the zoo.
 Aubree and Tanner got to touch a boa constrictor.
Jared is such a nice boy.  He is always happy and just perfect!
This week we got an awesome clock sent to us from Billy and Crystal Hunter who had lost their 2 month old daughter to SIDS in March.  They started a blog and along with her sister's organization, chose us to receive a personalized clock.  We love it.  Thank You!

MEMORY: (By Eric) I loved when we would be driving places and I would reach back and just hold Andrew's hand.  He would have the cutest smile on his face and be so content.  When I would let go of his hand, I would always tickle the inside of his thigh and he would give the cutest, deep belly laugh.   

5 comments:

Carol Lindsay said...

I found your blog through a mutual friend. I feel your love for your cute little Andrew and all your children. What a great family you have. That Aubrey is something else. What a wise girl she is.

Carol Lindsay said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Melanie said...

You little ones are TRULY amazing. Really, Truly! You guys have done such an amazing job with what you have been given.

That clock is beautiful. I'm so happy she chose you guys to receive it. What an awesome way to REMEMBER him.

Debbie said...

Love the nicknames for Andrew! I sent the book to your house but I don't think it will come before you leave for Spokane so you and Aubrey will have something to look for in the mail. :) It was so amazing to look at all those pics of Andrew. What a beautiful little baby and what great pictures you take! You need a picture in a locket to always wear or something so you'll be able to introduce him to anyone who didn't have a chance to meet him.

tara said...

I'm laughing so hard at the conehead picture. How cute.
I wish we lived closer so I could be there for you Jen. You have such a darling family.